我们是怎么了？

想像一下一张桌子上有两盘海南鸡饭和一盘炸鸡饭。你说，那盘的炸鸡饭是不是在做电灯泡呢？

CD店那么大，偏偏要跟着他的屁股走，你说，这意味着什么？

朋友，第一次看你那么烦，平时你烦的东东都斗不过你，因为到最后，你打败那些脚绊石了。而现在的你，好像被澎湃的海浪给冲乱情绪了。以前镇定的你被冲到哪去了？加油，朋友！

我想，电灯泡做久了，也会热。我不想再做电灯泡了。我累了。今晚的我，失常了。。。。。。。。。。。。这几天的我。。乱了方向感。。以前所定的目标。。我现在找也找不到了。。我。。怎么了？？

帽子

还记得在炎热的太阳下进行迎新会迷你运动会吗？笨笨的我忘了带帽子，帽子却自动送上门，把自己让给我戴。笨笨的我以为不会热，拒绝了。。笨笨的我嫌帽子有汗味，拒绝了。。笨笨的我不懂得珍惜帽子的存在，拒绝了。。笨笨的我什么都不懂，拒绝了。。帽子被拒绝到千里之外酱远，笨笨的我现在要回帽子了。。天气开始热了。。现在开始懂得怎样保护头发和头了。。帽子，当我需要的时候出现了，当我不需要的时候也出现了，却被我无视。。帽子现在被我弄丢了，笨笨的我当然是拿不回了。。帽子在哪里呢？难道帽子永远也拿不回了吗？

Work.. Am Lovin' It & Am Hatin' It Too

4^th day of work and I’m starting to enjoy it. 虫虫is luckier than me ‘coz got leng zai in her department!! God’s so unfair to not put me with that leng zai. Anyway, I’m not crazying over that leng zai. But someone is oh.

Enough for guys now. I’ve met some ngiao ji customers and those customers are all ah mu! But of course, there were some nice ones. They even said ‘thank you’ after I’ve found some right sizes of jeans for them. Thank YOU, customers!

During work, when there is no customers and only flies flying around, I would wander off to somewhere else. Like all the sad times I've been through. And it made me wonder, can I not go through those sad moments again? Can I not face those miserable things again??

It’s already not okay for me to sacrifice my time with friends. What more to say reminiscing the unbearable experience?

But looking at the positive side, at least I get to escape from Leo stuff during work. You can say I’m a coward, a hopeless coward, whatever you say. But I’m fed up of Leo. I’m a 16 years old girl, not 26. How can I handle the pressure when facing the lions in meeting? Lions roar right? Well, these lions roar too, but in a different way. I hate it. Friends are busying themselves with their own activities. I can’t bother to disturb them and ask for their help, no?

Enough about Leo, because of work, because I was too tired after work today, I forgot I had damn Physics tuition tonight! And that’s why I’m here at home blogging. I hate it. I hate it when I forgot something because of someone or something. It makes me feel I’m not being careful enough. I even got a scold from someone-you-know because of this. I hate it.

Trust me, next time you won’t be finding me working anywhere. I’m just not ready yet. I’m not quitting my work. I just don’t want my mistake to be repeated.

Working = Sacrifice Everything?

Remember this? Well, to prove to all of you that I really made my promise, yesterday I started working as Sales Assistant at Boulevard and I already missed out all the fun that I could have with my friends.

When I was getting ready to work, 虫虫msged me telling me she will watch Lion Dance Competition at Indoor that night. Wah, when I received her msg, I was so damn upset. Hey, I'm interested to watch too ya know? Only that my shift is till 10.45pm. If I go watch after my shift, I'm scared that the security guards will stop me from getting in.

Anyway, when I was standing there wandering somewhere else, then out of nowhere, that stupiak JoChai went to find me. I didn't dare to talk to her much since my ah tau is just near me.

FINALLY 10.45PM LIAW. Finally can go back to sleep on my fluffy bed, I went to the lockers to check my hp. Just then I realised Yun Hui also wanna check on me but she couldn't find where I was. Haha. Awwww... so many friends come to support me. 感动到暴啊.

Oh yeah, thanks to all of you that gave me support and 鼓励话. It made me feel like continue to work although it can be very mentally and physically tiring.

But one thing that made me very upset is that I have to sacrifice my time with my friends since my shift is mostly afternoon shift from 1pm till 10pm.

Like Sing Tze, Zhu Fei and Char Ler Ne who asked me to go watch Pirates of the Carribean 3. I have to turn down it. But they are willing to wait for my off day except for that heartless Sing Tze who watched herself liaw. :P

Then, just received 虫虫's msg saying that she's shopping now. What the fish? I was planning to go out with you guys during my off day and we can all go shopping, watch movie, buy my dress.... And you already went shopping by yourself. How heartless you 2 are. :P

But still, I'm damn sad. I want fun!

终于。。等这天等很久了。。

我们一群知识份子一到海边，什么都不顾了，直接奔跑到海滩，把脚浸到温暖的海水里，一切不快乐不顺利的东东通通扔掉！昨晚的事弄我考试是还是有点不安。 可是在海边跟几条疯疯颠颠的朋友一起对着海洋喊，心里的不愉快也被喊了出来，有种轻松的感觉，很怀念轻松的感觉，差点忘了它的感觉是如何了。

我超喜欢海边了。

海边有我们的回忆。。

有我们的脚迹。。。。

苦闷的日子

还有一天。。还有多一天就可以自由了。。老实说，我不期待明天的到来。明天考试一过，有要忙了。要忙Leo Forum的东东，要忙打工（如果有机会的话啦）。所以应该说等forum完后才能放松自己。这次的假期一定要过得充实点，不能再像以前一样了，每天不是对着电脑，就是hiao电视和手机。。

这次的考试，像他们说的，没有一个像样的。每天考完试，他们问我考得怎样的时候，我除了“我还活着”回答他们，真的想不到还能说什么了。短短两个星期，不知道我长了多少个白头发，不知道我老了多少。

明天的考试，会再让我失望吗？数学那科是我最后的希望把总平均拉回来。我一定要拼！不过在拼之前先blog,relax relax一下吧。这几天跟运慧和Grace和虫虫说好要一考完试就跑去海边玩，把读书的心情扔到大海里。希望我明天能见到海边。海边就在不远处。。海边，你等我，我来了。。。

Oh Joy! -.-

Once again, I've endured another embarrassing moment. Last night I couldn't sleep. I turned and turned on my bed until 12am I still couldn't get a sleep!! Then I just on my cellphone and sms-ed a friend in KL to wish him a happy birthday. I off my cellphone after that thinking he would be sooo touched I still remember his birthday and even wished him in a midnight.

Then this morning, after getting some sleep, I on my cellphone again and received his sms. I almost regretted opening that msg ok. His birthday wasn't today. Instead it was 9 May!! Gahh.. He said something 'It's still not late to wish me a happy bebebebelated birthday. Such a good friend." and I think he said that last sentence is to comfort me and to make me feel better. I'm soooo SORRY my dear friend for confusing your birthday with another friend of mine! However, still wanna wish you a happy bebebebebelated birthday, CALVIN TEO!!!! =)

Hate You, Hate Me

Don't judge me if you don't know me. If you don't know me well, don't act like you know me very well. Don't just simply say I belong to where and to whom 'coz it ain't true. I can't stop what you're thinking but can you stop talking behind my back? It's hurting you know. I'm starting to hate myself. Why can't you guys just leave me alone? Can't wait test is over so that I can run to the beach and scream all I want and do all the sane things I wanna do.

Failed With Colours

It's a fact. I flunk Bio and Fz this time. Get ready for red marks. YEAH~ When was the last time I fail my test?

..

I guess, NEVER.

Never did I fail in kindergarten, primary and now in secondary, broke my record. I should be proud of it. At least I've seen through the scariness and evilness of Malaysia education system. No biggie right? Drop class? I'd be happy to.

Oh yeah, made a little change in my dear blog. Instead of using all gloomy and blacky font, I've decided to paint my blog with colours! Title is also changed. No more fishy stuff now. I want colours, warna, 颜色, 色彩 in my blog. Mixture of colour add a bit of colour in my life right? I definitely need COLOURS in my LIFE now.

没有母亲在身边的母亲节

母亲节的那天一定是跟亲爱的母亲一起庆祝，一起欢乐。可是，奇怪的是，今年的母亲节我老妈竟不在我们的身边。我看今年的母亲节只有姐姐跟在KL的老妈庆祝吧。花都已拿回了，人就是不在。希望花能控制自己，尽量不在拜四后枯萎，一直保持它的新鲜和它的黄之美。

1st Time Studying At Pustaka

At first I had a study date with Sing Tze at Pustaka and then it turned out Yun Hui also came along and then when we arrived Vivian was there alone studying. So 2 people became 4 people studying together! Lol.

1st time studying at Pustaka and I already broke the rules there. I didn't know we cannot bring water bottles into the room. Instead we have to leave it at the security guard lockers! But who cares? The person at the counter didn't see me walking in with the bottle and I also didn't care lah. I guang1 ming2 zheng4 da4 put my bottle on the table. Hehe.

Vivian was the only person who made the most noise la. She wanted to throw rubbish also will make noise and everybody was staring at our direction. So embarassing ok!

While studying, that stupiak Yun Hui even wrote "Shh.. Diam!" word on a piece of paper 'coz 3 of us were making a lot of noise and we talked a lot. Sing Tze was the only one who concentrated the most 'coz she kept asking us questions that we didn't know how to answer. After we settled down everything and began to REALLY study, a bunch of guys who were sitting near us were making noise and she showed that notice to them. Then they wrote back a notice to us. Everything was so funny la.

I started to notice that there were many couples studying at Pustaka. Please lah, if you wanna study, don't bring your honey or dear along to study with. Can you REALLY focus?? Like me, even I study with friends also cannot study properly liao. What more to say couples?

Honestly, I studied 1 Chapter of Bio the whole afternoon nia. The distraction, the funny friends.. How to study ler? Hehe. Can only blame myself la.

We Are Not Nerds!!

Test is coming and I’m still here online and blogging. What to do? I have no choice but to give up. I really cannot stand it already ok! Everyone’s jio-ing A class saying A class students sure can get high marks or sure can become prefects and blah blah blah. What the fish? Don’t think A class is a class where all the brainies are studying. We can be loud, we can be noisy, we can be mischievous, we can be mean, we can be punky and most important we can have fun too, like all the other classes. So why make an endless line between us and you guys?

Gah!! I really can't stand the jio-ness from some of them. Honestly, if one day I go crazy because of studies, no doubt I will grab a knife and kill people with big mouth saying "A CLASS STUDENTS ARE SO GENG LER."

I really will.

失去机会

昨天等车的当儿就跑去3A帮忙合唱团的人包花for母亲节节日。谁知，那欠扁的Siti做媒人，想尽办法把我和他做在一起。但事实就是事实了，还能怎样？只会让我更不爽。后来，看到酱多朋友买花给他们的母亲，心里开始痒痒的，也想买朵康乃馨给老妈。于是就叫Siti如果有多的话就帮我收下来，最好是黄色的康乃馨。

回想起来，之前的母亲节除了送去年道德老师叫我们做的母亲节卡，我什么都没给过她，更不用说她的生日了。今年真的很想报答老妈，因为呀我发现她越来越疼我了哦。也许以前跟现在都是。也许我从来都没发现到吧直到最近。

看得出当我读书读到累，忙Leo Club的东东时露出疲劳的眼神，老妈就会跑过来问我肚子饿了吗还有拿东西给我吃。Mr.Ngu说得对，人越大就越懂得珍惜。

今天早上原本很兴奋要拿花，可是上天好选不选竟选今天来作弄我！Siti跑过来告诉我多余的花不能卖给我因为花的数量有限的关系。我都已还了钱，只想带花回家而已，上天都不让我吗？

虫虫婉琼说了一句话让我很想哭。

“难得家颖酱有心要送给她妈妈了。。Siti，真的没有花了吗?”

哇。。我当时才发现到我真的变很多了。老一岁的关系了吗？还有，为何之前没有先订购康乃馨呢？之前没有心哈？现在就有心了吗？

无奈。。

补习的时候，幸子sms我告诉我Siti已经把黄色的康乃馨给她，明天下午一起去Pustaka的时候就传给我。我看了，不是高兴，不是喜悦，而是再一次的无奈。老妈明天一早就要飞去KL啦。真的是很不如意。不管怎样，就是没机会把康乃馨给老妈。天注定我又能怎样？

Incidents In School

This morning, because of ytw spreading again, I had no choice but to ask Char-ler-ne to help me with the registration forms in Ah Thoo's office. Kla the conclusion is we ponteng skipped 2 periods of M3 lessons and went to his office to use his lagging computer. Duh, I was so frustrated typing all the names and emails out. Please lah, how is it possible for you to fill a form INCOMPLETE?? How old are you dude? Fill a form nia so simple ler still need us to remind you??

Anyway, after going back class, there wasn't anything that I could do. Studying? Please lah, no mood ok. When there are a bunch of friends sitting with you, do you think I would wanna ignore them and study? Plus, more diseases are spreading in our class, do you think I have the immune system to beat them all and concentrate on studies?

Then at Ah Thoo lesson, we heard ambulance siren. RC room was crowded. Prefects were walking (or should I say running wildy?) around school. What happened? I soo wanna jump out of class and see what was going on in Block D. Many rumours were spreading. Somebody got into a fight la, somebody fainted la, many man rumours la. Ah Phang even came out and went to the scene. I think this year quite soi lo because many unhappy things happened. Countless time RC room is crowded with people liao lor.

Anyway, only did we know that the truth behind all this. In Ah Thoo tuition, I forced him to spill it out. Wow, talk about discipline and drugs, I never expect her would do like that to herself. So immature ok.

Speaking of immature, that MORE IMMATURE GUY WHO ALWAYS COMES INTO OUR CLASS had an arguement with stupiak Louis this afternoon. What the fish?? Dude, if you wanna fight, fight with those gangsters outside lah, why fight with the wushu-pro? Only will hurt yourself la. He was angry over something. He punched, yelled, kicked. We were all staring at him with mouth opened. How could he do that to her?

I SOOOO HATE GUYS WHO ARE VOILENT ESPECIALLY TO GIRLS!! Who do they think they are? Guys jiu can hit, beat, whack, slap, kick, punch girls isit? Soo ketinggalan zaman ok. Please la, if you like the girl, don't hit her by showing your 'love' to her. It is just pure annoying.

EDIT: Omfish!! Check this out. I saw this in Friendster.

Date:	Wednesday, 9 May, 2007 5:12 PM
Subject:	regret&sorry(jocelyn lau)
Message:	....i feel very sorry to my ex-gf....i had made her angry.....actually,i duno y she keep escape from me....eventhough we already bcum friend......who can help me??i really need her....y ppl wana keep spreading da bad things?wat's wrong if i chat with da person tat i really trust?y?y?

You don't know why she keeps escaping from you? 'Coz you are darn irritating, that's why. Bullshit+voilent guy.

新的传染病

班上除了心灵欢喜和apj，还会有什么呢？最近来了个“芋头嘴”。有点像apj的作风。也许在大家的眼中，她是个蛮可爱蛮受欢迎的朋友。。她却是我的眼中钉。

“我怕我会忘记哦，所以要快快告诉你。”拜托，我是你的啥？你短暂记忆库里其中一个保管员哈？这种东西都要我帮你记，好心，成熟点可以吗？

还有，不要随随便便在那里传芋头瘟好吗？你酱喜欢看到我们因你的芋头瘟而全身发痒，真的比apj还要差劲！今天朋友跑过来问我做么我酱moody，你偏偏在那时刻找我，又叫我做你的保管员，确保你不忘记。难道连我跟朋友诉苦的时间都没有吗？

不要每次jio我和我的朋友！你有话就直说，不需要拐弯摸角的，这只会让你的芋头脸显得更丑陋。最好也收敛你的芋头嘴。你知道吗？你的冷嘲热讽，我还需要时间习惯习惯，因为你不在班的时间实在是让我很怀念。

顺便提醒你，好人的耐性是有限度的。不要看人家F3好欺负就乱乱丢工作给他们。推卸责任你最有本领吧？什么借口都可以给。不会做？想个新一套的谎言再来骗我吧，我可能会就这样傻傻的点头。